If freckles were lovely, and day was night,
And measles were nice and a lie warn't a lie,
 Life would be delight,-
 But things couldn't go right 
 For in such a sad plight
I wouldn't be I.

If earth was heaven, and now was hence,
And past was present, and false was true,
 There might be some sense 
 But I'd be in suspense
 For on such a pretense
You wouldn't be you.

If fear was plucky, and globes were square,
And dirt was cleanly and tears were glee
 Things would seem fair,-
 Yet they'd all despair,
 For if here was there
We wouldn't be we.