Here you will find the Poem Milton of poet Robert Fuller Murray
with apologies to Lord Tennyson O swallow-tailed purveyor of college sprees, O skilled to please the student fraternity, Most honoured publican of Scotland, Milton, a name to adorn the Cross Keys; Whose chosen waiters, Samuel, Archibald, Helped by the boots and marker at billiards, Wait, as the smoke-filled, crowded chamber Rings to the roar of a Gaelic chorus? Me rather all those temperance hostelries, The soda siphon fizzily murmuring, And lime fruit juice and seltzer water Charm, as a wanderer out in South Street, Where some recruiting, eager Blue-Ribbonites Spied me afar and caught by the Post Office, And crimson-nosed the latest convert Fastened the odious badge upon me.